Cowboys and Libertarians



I apologize for exposing you to this tired joke, but I am making a point here.

This young woman asks the old Cowboy if she can share his table for two in the busy, crowded bar. “So, what do you do?” she asks, by way of making conversation. “Well, I’m a cowboy”, he says. “I spend all my time with the cows, fencing them in, feeding them, doctoring them, rounding them up. I’m a cowboy. So what do you do?” She answers “Oh, I’m a lesbian, I spend all my time thinking about women, and about sex with women, if I close my eyes I see a picture of a beautiful, naked woman”. The conversation drifts on, she finishes her drink and leaves. Within a few minutes a young man joins the old Cowboy, and asks “So, what do you do?” The old cowboy looks perplexed, then answers “Well, I thought I was a cowboy, but I have just been shown that I am a lesbian”.

I got a fair amount of feedback on the street about the previous column on political definitions, defining terms like left and right and liberal and conservative and libertarian. I was quite surprised that nobody bothered to argue with my definitions. The most common remark was along the lines of “I thought I was a Liberal (or Conservative or NDP), but your column showed me I am a Libertarian”.

Our Canadian culture (the real one, not the goody-two-shoes nonsense from the cities) is to be acquisitive, thrifty, and very security conscious – we buy more insurance, in more different kinds, than anybody else in the world.

We value private property immensely, after all, we all came here to be able to own land and not be a tenant or a serf to the ‘upper class’. Liberals of Laurier’s day would be outraged at our present situation, as the only country which has no right to property in its constitution (except the outright Communist ones).

We are class-conscious, for example my American cousin, asked what she does, proudly says “I am a bartender”, while a Canadian is more likely to say “I am only a bartender”. At the same time we value equality under the law, the right to succeed or fail on our own merits, not because of birth or class or wealth.

Above all, we value freedom; freedom from interference in our private lives, our home is our castle, — back off, government!

All three of our parties started off as ‘freedom parties’, the Liberals in Laurier’s day, the NDP in its previous CCF incarnation, and the Conservatives in its main root, the Reform. All three have morphed into supporting the politically correct, big government, anti-privacy, anti-private property agenda.

Little wonder, then, that so few of us bother to vote, we who have that traditional Canadian value system, we who value freedom, have no political home!

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